Thursday, March 26, 2009

LOL


okay i was not going to post today, but here i am. i saw this jokes somewhere i thought they were funny, so i decided to share. Enjoy

At A World Women's Conference the first speaker, from England, stood up:

"At last year's conference we spoke about being more assertive with our husbands.

Well, after the conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer cook for him and that he would have to do it himself.

After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had cooked a wonderful roast lamb." The crowd cheered.

The second speaker, from America, stood up:

"After last year's conference I went home and told my husband that I would no longer do his laundry and that he would have to do it himself.

After the first day I saw nothing. After the second day I saw nothing. But after the third day I saw that he had done not only his own washing but my washing as well." The crowd cheered.

The third speaker, from Nigeria, stood up:

"After last year conference I go house and tell my husband that I no go do im cooking, cleaning or go market for am again, and dat he go dey do am imsef.

After the first day i no see anytin, the second day sef, I see notin. But after the third day, as the swelling begin go down, I start to see small small from my left eye.

*************************************************************************************

The youngest son in a family asked his father: "Daddy, what's the difference between 'potential' and 'reality'? Dad: "I will show you." He turned to his wife and asked: "Would you sleep with Tom Cruise for two million dollars?" Wife: "Yes. I would never waste such an Opportunity to become a millionaire." Then dad turned to his daughter: "Would you sleep with Will Smith for 1 million dollars?" Daughter: "Yes. That is my fantasy." Dad turned to his older son: "Would you sleep with Denzel Washington for 1 million dollars?" Son: "Yes! Imagine what I would do with $1 million." Then Dad concluded by telling his youngest son: "You see, "potentially", we are sitting on $4 million. But in "reality" we are living with 2 prostitutes and 1 gay dude. Did that answer your question?."

thanks for the comments from the last post.Have a wonderful week(what is left of it)

36 comments:

  1. first first first first...am so happy to be first.

    It sure is rainy in my area too. I love the jokes, swelling is a typical example for Naija men.lol My father being one of such.lol

    Stay warm

    ReplyDelete
  2. Omg that first one was wrong on so many levels! lol

    Have a wonderful rest of the week as well :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. lmao @ the naija woman.. i was wondering wat would say from the beginning!!..Naija guys just dont roll like that as per house work nd the likes!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Funny...I needed a laugh today. Thank you (smiles)....

    ReplyDelete
  5. wrong wrong wrong and hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  6. lmao @ d second joke..........

    ReplyDelete
  7. LOL@ that 2nd joke mehn, it killed me!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. the first was so wrong...but funny.
    second one killed me...I just woke up tho. lol ...

    ReplyDelete
  9. Jokes!!! Lol!

    But why does the Nigerian woman speak pidgin at an international conference. And with all this Chris Brown wife beating talk.

    I'm being highly critical though....hehe

    ReplyDelete
  10. A little humor for the weekend uhn brownskin? Nice. Have a fab. one too!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. @YNB yea you were first. thanks. i ll stay warm

    @lolia thanks you too

    @Tay-mee lol the naija woman was funny(you see why i wanted to share it)

    @just---toluwa lol yea thanks

    @freedom you are welcome. am glad i made you laff

    @funms - the rebirth lol yea i know t

    @tis is all about me lol yea thanks for stopping by

    @dante lol yea thanks. hope you had a nice night

    @abujamaiden lol i tire for the woman oo

    @LG yea lol

    @blogoratti yea thanks you too

    ReplyDelete
  12. om! my tumy is painin me! that second joke was toooo funny! lmao. nice one

    ReplyDelete
  13. hahahahahahah..the second one killed me..really funny

    ReplyDelete
  14. lmao- na only the naija woman go suffer abi,

    the second one just threw me off, lmao

    Thanks for stopping by BSNC and helping me out with the link. muuuahhhhh!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Read these two somewhere as well..

    Still has me in stitches though..

    Nice one..

    ReplyDelete
  16. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! that just killed me! first time here...and LOVING IT!

    ReplyDelete
  17. LOL at the jokes! I hadn't heard the second one before.

    ReplyDelete
  18. LOL..ive actually heard the first one before...

    the second joke is just crazy!!!

    my first time here...will be back!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Hahahahahaahahaha....
    9ice one chica.

    ReplyDelete
  20. hahaha
    Although I have heard these jokes before, it always make me laugh.
    a good one to start the weekend....with nice jokes
    have a wonderful weekend

    ReplyDelete
  21. @tiwa lol pls control the tummy o. thanks for stopping by

    @wordmerchant thanks am glad you liked it

    @zena lol yea i know and you are welcome... thanks for stopping by

    @RocNaija thanks and congratulations again on ur win

    @GNG thanks am glad you liked it

    @exschoolnerd lol thanks.. congratulations on you award and thanks for stopping by

    @my world thanks

    @buttercup lol yea i know

    @naijagirl yea thanks. have a nice weekend too

    thanks guyz

    ReplyDelete
  22. Great joke though the first was. Perhaps she got the black eye bc she didnt handle the telling-ur-husband issue well being the illiterate she was...The joker made us believe such by assigning her the pidgin english diction.

    ReplyDelete
  23. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  24. lmao...that Naija woman needs to be taught how to use area boys to control her husband at the next conference

    ReplyDelete
  25. LMFAO!
    *dead*
    thats jokes mehn

    ReplyDelete
  26. @kenn-knotty yea thanks.. am glad you liked the jokes and thanks for stopping by

    @jhazmyn lol yea and thanks for stopping by

    @afrobabe lol i know rite...

    @DeeDee Brigton lol yea thanks and thanks for stopping by

    thanks people

    ReplyDelete
  27. hahahahahahahahahahahahaha...... im still laughing my ass off!!! (wiping the tears), how do you manage to do it?

    ReplyDelete
  28. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!! OH MISS BROWN..I JUST HAD A DAMN GOOD LAUGH!!!!!!!
    P.S;XOXO

    ReplyDelete
  29. Finally,got ma comment page back on track...
    sorry for the mess and thx for stopping by....

    ReplyDelete
  30. The jokes were luvly. Mm, I like this place, and thank you for stopping by too.
    "I'll beee back!" (stated Arnold Schwarzennegar style)
    Cheers!

    ReplyDelete
  31. These jokes got me smiling after hours of frowning.

    ReplyDelete
  32. @ lol thanks scarlet am glad you liked it

    @ladykoko ohh thats nice to know. its good to have a good laff o

    @My World you are very welcome. yea i just stopped by

    @cidersweet thanks lol yea and i ll be waiting..

    @O'Dee that is wonderful to know. please smile jare

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hmmm, men!!! But then, what of women?

    ReplyDelete
  34. lol i don't know, but i don't think a woman will do that a man. unless.........

    ReplyDelete

Say what you need to say.