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Sunday, March 11, 2012

THIS TWIN THING

Now that my sister is engaged everybody is looking at me like its your turn next. Both my granm's have been making side remarks. My paternal granm's that i thought was on my side told me she had her 4th baby when she was my age. ( Am i supposed to give her a trophy)



Three of my aunties and still counting.. are lining up the "so-called eligible bachelors" they can find. Why don't they just do a, "BSNC bachlorette show" mcheew. ( i know they mean well though)



The other day i heard my mum and her mum( my maternal granm's) on the phone talking about me. They were going back and forth, i even thought my mum was supporting me until i heard her say, "she is not even 25 yet". Wait so if i am not engaged/married when i turn 25 i should go jump inside the ocean abi.




God give me the strength to not go cucu on somebody one day lol. It will not be funny then. On the real though, i get that we are twins and we are expected to do almost everything together. However when it is all said and done, everybody has their own life to live. Pray for me oh lol.




By the way if you see my husband, tell him he needs to hurry up. We are all eager to meet him.







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a man left work one friday afternoon. but, it being payday, instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire week's wages.

When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night he was confronted by a very angry wife and was barraged for nearly two hours with a tirade befitting his actions.

Finally his wife stopped the nagging and simply said to him, "How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?" To which he replied, "

That would be fine with me!"

Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results. Come Thursday, the swelling went down just enough where he could see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

LADIES WHY SO MEAN

Man "Haven't we met before?"
Woman "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the VD Clinic."

Man "Haven't I seen you someplace before?"
Woman "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man "Is this seat empty?"
Woman "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man "So, wanna go back to my place ?"
Woman "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man "Your place or mine?"
Woman "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man "I'd like to call you. What's your number?"
Woman "It's in the phone book."

Man "But I don't know your name."
Woman "That's in the phone book too."

Man "So what do you do for a living?"
Woman "I'm a female impersonator."

Man "What sign were you born under?"
Woman "No Parking."

Man "Hey, baby, what's your sign?"
Woman "Do not Enter"

Man "How do you like your eggs in the morning?"
Woman "Unfertilized"


Man "I know how to please a woman."
Woman "Then please leave me alone."

Man "I want to give myself to you."
Woman "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man "I can tell that you want me."
Woman "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."

Man "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
Woman "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?"
Woman "Sorry, I don't date outside my species.."

Man "Your body is like a temple."
Woman "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man "I would go to the end of the world for you."
Woman "Yes, but would you stay there?"

Friday, March 9, 2012

THAT MOMENT

That terrifying journey (in a full house with no towels) from the bathroom to your room lol.

Have a nice weekend ;)

Thursday, March 8, 2012

3 YEARS (BITTERSWEET SYMPHONY)

I was going over some of my older post today. I couldn't help but notice that it has been exactly three years i have been blogging. Even though i didn't blog for half of most years lol. Its amazing how time flies. I have enjoyed ever moment of blogging, met a lot of wonderful and talented writers. I also got a peep of people's life and innermost thoughts. Its an amazing avenue i tell you.



I opened this blog three years ago and three days later that same year, i found out my dearest cousin passed away. I am so happy about my blog anniversary, but at the same time i miss my cousin dearly. Its a bittersweet moment i guess. It's all good though :)

Cheers loves. Thanks for everything :)




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A husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts, honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It’s been flickering for weeks now.

He looks at her and says angrily; fix the light, now? Does it look like i have a G.E. logo printed on my forehead? i don't think so!

The wife asks, well then, could you fix the fridge door? It won't close right.

To which he replied, fix the fridge door? Does it look like I have Westinghouse written on my forehead? I don't think so.

Fine, she says then you could at least fix the steps to the front door? They’re about to break.

I’m not a damn carpenter and I don't want to fix steps, he says. Does it look like I have ace hardware written on my forehead? I don't think so. I’ve had enough of you. I’m going to the bar!!! So he goes to the bar and drinks for a couple of hours. He starts to feel guilty about how he treated his wife, and decides to go home and help out. As he walks into the house he notices the steps are already fixed. As he enters the house, he sees the hall light is working.. As he goes to get a beer, he notices the fridge door is fixed. ‘Honey, he asks, how'd all this get fixed?

She said, well, when you left I sat outside and cried. Just then a nice young man asked me what was wrong, and i told him. He offered to do all the repairs, and all i had to do was either go to bed with him or bake a cake.

He said, so what kind of cake did you bake him?

She replied, hellooooo.......do you see Betty Crocker written on my forehead? I don't think so! =====

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

IF IT AIN'T BROKE..

I think i forgot to tell you guyz that my twin graduated this year plus she got engaged!( no wedding dates yet, but still). I am so happy for her. I think God knew that if i came here alone, i would not have made it this far. She and my fam has been one of the rocks in my life. I will literally take multiple bullets for her ( or wear a bullet proof). I am so proud of her. My brother got promoted, the other one got a better job, the rest are doing well... and me well i am alive! yay! lol




I have never been crazy about losing weight or carrying out crazy diet until recently. I have never been skinny or fat. As i grew older i have added a little something in my lady lumps and lovely trunks lol as expected of a young female, but as long as my belly stays the same i am good to go. I am not vain, but i thank God for it everyday lol.



I went for my twin's graduation out of state at the beginning of this year. I noticed she dropped 2 dress sizes and boy she looked good( she was sexy and she knew it lol). It wasn't a problem until a few people thought i was her elder sister. say what now? her elder sister ke, this babe is a couple of minutes older than me( even if its 2 seconds she is still older than me). I ignored them at first. Then one of my brother's friend was like eh... uh.. did you add weight? He is lucky i respect my elders and i have a good heart. God knows what i would have said or done. I don't let people get to me, but the guy was.... well to say the least i was not happy.



When i got back from the trip, i googled alot about weight loss, diets and exercising. I even checked my weight, it was still the same as last year. My belly was intact, i did my little dance ( i am not vain really lol). I was okay, but i was still determined to drop a dress size. I embarked on the strangest journey to drop a dress size. I ate like a bird, switched my exercise routine and drank lots of water.


Five weeks later, i actually dropped two dress sizes instead of one. I was so proud of myself. I found every excuse to go out that week. I felt like Jennifer Hudson lol(it wasn't that much sha ). I got so carried away, i stopped dieting and exercising. Two weeks later, I was coming back from a friend's birthday dinner and i felt my belly jingle. I was like what was that? ( Jamb question). I did not just add everything back, but i added more than my original weight. I think i cried or did i wail.


Its been three weeks now and i am almost back to my original weight, not quite though. Basically if it aint broke, don't fix it. Now i am trying to fix what was never broken in the first place mchewww.


Hope you all Spring and March forward this month.





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A man and his wife check into a hotel. The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest.

She lies down on the bed... just then, and elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she's thrown out of the bed.

Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more. Again a train shakes the room so violently, she's pitched to the floor.

Exasperated, she calls the front desk, asks for the manager. The manager says he'll be right up.

The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true. "Look... lie here on the bed -- you'll be thrown right to the floor!" So he lies down next to the wife.

Just then the husband walks in. "What," he says, "are you doing here!?!"

The manager calmly replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?"

SMILE

Whoa I havent blogged since November. I could have sworn I have blogged like three times this year, well in my head that is. Wow it's been a while. Hope its not too late to say Happy New year hehe.



How have you guyz been? Hope 2012 has been special for you. I hear alot of wedding bells, engagement, bundle of joys, promotions, graduations....



This year has been wierd for me. It has not be good and it has not be bad either. Its just there. You know how you get so frustrated then you find your frustration amusing. I am not crazy though lol . That is where i am right now. I am thankful though. I have great family and friends who has always been there for me. I am blessed and thankful.




Everyone passes through one phase or the other in life. Things will turn out fine. I just know it. Currrently listening to "Krik Frankin - Smile" on replay. That song lifts me up. No matter what i will continue to "SMILE"




Enough of my boring life lol. Just wanted to reach out and blog for real not in my head lol. Hope you guyz are okay though. if not Just smile, God is preparing something special. When you are down to nothing, God is up to something. Take care loves. I will try not to blog in my head lol.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

I am so thankful this thanksgiving. I am thankful for everything. The sorrow, pain, joy and happiness. God has been faithful to me and my family. I really can't take him enough. I am thankful for family, friends, life, health, my blog and my followers. I am mostly grateful to God. Have a merry happy thanksgiving!. Be good for goodness sake :-)