I AM AWAKE

Hello loves. How have you guyz been? Hope you guys are good. I know my last post was really sad, but I am feeling a bit better now. At that moment I felt like that Green day’s song , “wake me up when September ends”.


Summer has come and passed
the innocent can never last
wake me up when September ends


as my memory rests
but never forgets what I lost
wake me up when September ends



I guess I am awake now lol, but on the real though I am feeling better. As long as I am still breathing and my heart is still beating, I have a purpose on this earth abi. Anyways my mum emailed me this story and it made me feel even better, so I decided it to share. It may be meaningful to you as it was to me.





Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods. They were discussing their hopes and dreams when the first tree said, 'Someday I hope to be a treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver and precious gems. I could be decorated with intricate carving and everyone would see the beauty.'

Then the second tree said, 'Someday I will be a mighty ship. I will take Kings and queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world. Everyone will feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull.'

Finally the third tree said, 'I want to grow to be the tallest and straightest Tree in the forest. People will see me on top of the hill and look up to my branches, and think of the heavens and God and how close to them I am reaching. I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will always remember me.'

After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true, a group of woodsmen came upon the trees. When one came to the first tree he said, 'This looks like a strong tree, I think I should be able to sell the wood to a carpenter, 'and he began cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he knew that the carpenter would make him into a treasure chest.

At the second tree the woodsman said, 'This looks like a strong tree. I should be able to sell it to the shipyard.' The second tree was happy Because he knew he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.

When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened because he knew that if they cut him down his dreams would not come true. One of the woodsmen said, 'I don't need anything special from my tree, I'll take this one,' and he cut it down.

When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was made into a feed box for animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This was not at all what he had prayed for.

The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of being a mighty ship and carrying kings had come to an end.

The third tree was cut into large pieces, and left alone in the dark.

The years went by, and the trees forgot about their dreams.

Then one day, a man and woman came to the barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby in the hay in the feed box that was made from the first tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event and knew that it had held the greatest treasure of all time.

Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were out on the water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to keep the men safe. The men woke the sleeping man, and He stood and said 'Peace' and the storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that it had carried the King of Kings in its boat.

Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the streets as the people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they came to a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the top of a hill. When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at the top of the hill and be as close to God as was possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it.

The moral of this story is that when things don't seem to be going your way, always know that God has a plan for you. If you place your trust in Him, God will give you great gifts.

Each of the trees got what they wanted, just not in the way they had imagined.

We don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just know that His Ways are not our ways, but His ways are always best.







Did I hear an Amen! .

Let me use this opportunity to thank some of the people who reached out to me. Caramel D thanks for the warm and kind messages on twitter. Thanks for calling me seye, you have always been a good friend. 9ja great thanks for always checking on me, you no get part 2 lol. Mizchif I am so grateful for your message, you did not only relate with me, but you also shared something personal. Random One I did not forget you oh , you know you are one of my yori yori’s lol. Thanks dearies : )



Thanks to my followers and the people who check on this blog every now and then. I hope I can blog about something happier soon.




Happy new month people. I hope you guyz have a wonderful independence weekend. Like rihanna would say, “cheers to the freakin weekend”.

IT'S ONLY TEMPORARY

Hey everyone. I know it’s been a while. How have you guyz been? I missed you guys. I promised myself that the next time I come here; I will blog about my grandma. She has been around for a while and I truly enjoyed their company, but I have not been a happy camper.





First half of this year was wonderful. I was overfilled with joy and happiness. My siblings either finished school, or got a job or got a promotion. Nothing could go wrong. My brother’s wife delivered a handsome baby boy. My first nephew ever, I was hoping for a girl, but oh well. To top it off I even graduated from nursing school. I was really grateful and thankful for God’s blessings to my family.







Second half of the year was shockingly different. First of all I lost a close friend. I did not believe he was dead until I saw his lifeless body during his funeral. I could not sleep at night or concentrate during the day. All I could think about was his lifeless body. My twin warned me to not look at the body, but did I listen? It took me about 3 weeks before I could have a good night sleep. It was a terrible period. I kept in touch with his family and I was glad to find out there were doing much better. I still pray for his family from time to time. My mum and my grandma were supported. I found a reason to smile again. A month later, after this incident, I got a call from my uncle in Nigeria. He told me my aunt passed away that morning. My aunt that I spoke to two days ago! . I even joked about bringing her to the states this December. Less than two months, another big blow in the stomach. It affected my grandma so much. My mum tried to be strong for both of us, but sometimes I feel her breaking down. I didn’t tell my friends. I just carried on like there was no problem in the world, yet I was weak inside.






I know it’s unhealthy to keep my emotions bottled up, but I can’t help it. I grew up with a lot of boys and they hardly show their emotions. I guess that is one of the bad habits I picked up from them. Blogger is one of the few places I can really let things out. I am still trying to get over my aunts death and put myself together. Then recently in the mail, I got the result of my test. I failed the test. The test I have been preparing for. I know they say I can still take the test again this year, but really I failed. I am still in shock because I prepared for it and I even prayed about it on several occasions. To top it off, I didn’t get the job I applied for a while ago.






At this point, I think I am almost completely shut down. I am emotionally drained, mentally weak and physically exhausted. However, I am still spiritually hopeful. The last time I got this low was when I lost my dad. I was powerless and prayed everyday for a couple of weeks that I die in my sleep. The difference between then and now is that I may be depressed and feeling really down, but I am not praying for death. I am hopeful and praying for a brighter day. It may seem really dark now, but I know there is a light at the end of this tunnel. I just hope this pain will stop before the end of this year. I may not know why all these things are happening right now, but I am a strong believer of the phrase, “everything happens for a reason”. Just remember me in your prayers. I hope next time I come here, I will be in a better mood : ). They say in every situation you find yourself, gives thanks to the lord. Thank you lord.




Congratulations to Sirius for the newest member of their family and Gee on her recent engagement. Nice anon we are going to miss you around this spot : )