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Monday, March 16, 2009

IT IS WELL, JOB....

This past week has been rough for me, but it is well... i just know everything will be okay. everything happens for a reason

My job this week was okay( remember from my other post; my job is just to take care of a guy, clean, feed and change him). Well this week was different because his cousin came over and he stayed with my client all day. His cousin was kind of cute( okay the guy really try), tall, dark.. yea you get the drift. The cousin was staring at me all day and licking his lips( u know like ll cool j does). I honestly thought it was offensive and i felt soo uncomfortable.. here i was trying to do my job and this guy was giving me the creeps. i just ignored him or at least i tried to..I fed the guy and clean him up, but i could not watch TV with him afterwards because his cousin was there. i heard them talking about me, but i could not make out what they were saying. all i heard was she is new, she is cutee then something about shy and african... i had an idea of what they were talking about though. i heard footsteps, i knew it was the cousin.. i just pretended like i was engrossed in a book i found on top of the table. i could feel him staring at me, but i intentionally refused to look at him. He was about to say something when my client called me. i walked so fast i thought i was going to fall down( i was like make this man do dey go now.. ahh ahh).I answered my client, he told me he wanted me to clean and change his catheter(u know the condom thing that connects to the tube which he uses to urinate) and this is the most embarrassing part of the job o.. at least for me. i bought the things i needed to clean and change him, his cousin decided to show up at that moment. i just stood there waiting for him to leave from 5 minutes to 20 minutes to 30 minutes...

my client: ms brownskin what are you waiting for?.. u can proceed

brownskin: hmm em em but but your cou your cousin...

my client: oh him, don't worry about him. just ignore him and carry on

brownskin: please Mr cousin can u excuse us for a moment

cousin: I'm watching a show i missed it the last time, i heard it was funny.. do you mind?

brownskin: its okay you can stay( i wanted to slap his cousin ehh, what is his own now)

I ignored him and resumed with the task at hand. As i was cleaning him, his penis decided to stand up again. i thought it was a mistake the first time. i was really hoping it wouldn't happen again, but it did. i acted as the professional that i am and carried on with what i was doing, but the unexpected happen not only was his penis sky-high, it actually moved. i thought i was mistaken or something, but when it moved again i stepped back, and as expected my clients and cousin were shaking with laughter. I was soo embarrassed. i know i should be used to it by now, but its wasn't fair. did they think this job is easy. i no blame them sha na condition make crayfish bend. i just raised my head up and cleaned him, the condom took me 2minutes this time( Glory be to God from 30minutes to 2minutes). no mind me jare.. people are saying their experts in dancing, singing,writing... me i dey happy say i be expert for condom wearing( i neva even reach expert stage, but i try sha.. its not easy o). I sha finished and walked up to both and gave them a deafening slap.. and told them to never laff at me again.. ahh ahh what do they mean by that, do i look like a clown( okay okay i didn't really do it, i was actually thinking of it sha.. lol . fear no let me slap person like that o and Agata for that matter)

5 hours later, the cousin finally left after trying to get my attention for hours ( see me see wahala o dem send u come). I thought he was okay before oo, but after all those intense staring and lips licking i was just too uncomfortable


My client's babe says i am too young to be working for him( because most people who have worked for him in the past are in their 40's or 50's). Talk about putting sand in some one's garri.. hmm i need this job. this woman let me be oo

I was talking to my uncle yesterday and he told me he did a similar job. he own case is different because he was a doctor back home, but u know since he has no paper and all that time, man must survive...

My uncle and his friend were working in this nursing home and they had to do the same thing i did with my job, just that they had 6 patients each and my client doesn't really defecate. well they started the job, everything was going fine until his friend started complaining

uncle's friend: bros i don tire for this job haba, which can thing be this who go believe say a whole doctor like me go dey clean person sheet. mehh this job don tire me oo. no be say the money make sense in the first place.

uncle: wetin we go do now, man must survive. make we just use this one hold body small before we write our exam

uncle's friend: i no no about u, but today is my last day oo. i no just fit again. worst comes to worst i go go back to naija, at least i still get dignity there..

My uncle's friend eventually left the job. my uncle still carried on. he was like its not that bad now this people to do sef..(his friend)... so this day my uncle has finish feeding and cleaning them up, one more patient to go.. my uncle fed and cleaned her up( he said him even decided to powder her. so she could scent nice). My uncle was about to leave her when he heard a booming farting sound, he just changed her less than 20 seconds ago. he was like okay let me just change her.. big mistake..... when he opened the diaper, the smell was intoxicating and the sheet was steaming hot, yea literally with smoke and all. there and then my uncle quit the job and worked away( i no say man must survive, i ll not kill myself now. a whole doctor like me..). job in this Yankee is not easy oo lol

17 comments:

Bibi said...

crazy girl. thats what you are. i can't believe that you let your patient's cousin watch you put a condom on him. make your agency nor hear am o. lol. as for that cousin, he is a freak. and you blame am? fine brownskinaijachic like you? if he nor stare, e mean say he paralyze for where he cousin nor paralyze. lol

Miss FlyHigh - LondonsNaijaQueen said...

This was a great read madam , I'm a bit annoyed with the cousin though ..ah ah wetin b his problem .... he should of left joh ..standing there waching u ..thats taking the p.
if you don't mind me asking how old are you ?
if the girlfriends are jealous they should come an look after! nonsense and rubbish ..
You know his 'Penis' may not be paralysed lol ..because theyw ay it is displaying behaviour ah ..
hope u cool

Gee said...

Good stuff maami...
I just saw the topic and smiled *IT IS WELL*
Thats was we had been talking of in my church lately...

thnx 4 stopping by...

brownskinaijachic said...

@ bibi hahahahah no kill me with laff oo. dont mind the yeye cousin jo

@ Miss flyhigh lol i think u may be rite about his penis oo.i am in my ealry 20's.. i tire for his girlfriend jor..

@gee thanks. it is well

Vera Ezimora said...

Yikes! The one time a man got a hard on while I was giving him a bed bath, I had to stop. I no do abeg

blogoratti said...

lol @ LLcool J lickin' lips.
That's a real difficult job, but good thing you handled the situation well, some people might have practically lost it(slapping them and all,lol). The nerve!

mizchif said...

LMAO!!! Your poor, poor uncle. Pls,life is not that hard haba. After getting a degree u will now be working as a shit packer!
Olorun maje o!

Fashinga said...

hehehhehehhehehe....No kill me with laff o!!!
Na wa oh..why would somebody graduate from skul to be cleaning someone's mess??? well i guess if no one does it, who will??

That cousin is a nonsensical atom of a nonentity...i cannot even begin to fanthom the degree of his bombastic and.....ok now, i'm really starting to sound crazy...lol

Later Hun!!
F

Rita said...

More grease to your elbows...it is not easy...Is your middle name "Patience"? :-)

brownskinaijachic said...

@vera lol na so we see am. somone has to do it.

@blogoratti i know right.. i just tried to hold my composure.

@mizchiff hahaha not just any degree, the guy finished medical school. well that was then, he is a doctor now in the states.

@fashinga lol abi someone has to do it. chei dont kill me with your vernacular terminology lol.

@rita lol i know my middle name should be patient.. thanks

@

Naijadude said...

I understand what you mean ehn! But get a hard on while changing him ke?? thats the end of the job ooh.. but man pikin go make money ooh!!

BSNC said...

lol i know. i got to do what i got to do..

Buttercup said...

Wow..u dey try o..big ups mehn!

BSNC said...

lol thanks buttercup.. na so we see am

Tigeress said...

LOL!! I feel for ur uncle. But mehn i dont think i can ever do that kin job. Then again, i did babysit when i was 16 and i had to clean poop when changing the baby's diapers. but worst job i've done is working as a waitress in a cafe when i was 17.

BSNC said...

lol yes tigeress it is not easy. trust me baby's poop and adult's poop are two different thing. there is pooh and there is pooh lol.

rethots said...

"its okay you can stay( i wanted to slap his cousin ehh,..." will teach you how you can achieve this next time.