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Thursday, April 16, 2009

DRIVING LESSIONS


My dad just got back from work, he was in the parlor reading The Guardian( a newspaper). It was about 6:00pm, so the sun was still setting. I was 15 going on 16, done with high school, so I had a long break, trying to prepare for JAMB. This was my third time that week of asking my dad the same favour over and over again.( I can be a pest when I really want something). I entered the sitting room and said my greetings. He replied, but he never took his eyes off the paper. I tried to get his attention

BSNC: daddy I love your new shoes, where did you get them from. Have you eaten today, I can get something for you. What are reading….. ( I got tired of asking questions). Daddy, daddy…. daddy!!!

Dad: For Christ sake bsnc, what do you want? Can’t you see am tired (he finally put down the news paper)

BSNC: Daddy I have been asking you for this little favour since last week. I want to learn how to drive. I have so much time on my hands now. I just want to learn how to drive

Dad: you are too young. How many girls your age do you see driving a car.. ehh?

BSNC: but da…

Dad: I said no. If you want to go out, tell your brothers or better still tell my driver.

BSNC: daddy is not fair oo. Shey its because am a girl… baby ( my younger brother) can drive, but I can’t.. Why.. . Its not like am asking you for a car even though you brought cars for my brothers when they graduated from high school. This world is so unfair, there is no justice. Women are always treated like second class citizen. You are a lawyer now, you should know all this ( I was not backing down this time)

Dad: he took one look at me, he started to frown, but he couldn’t hold back the laughter that came out. My goodness bsnc when did you become a lawyer?

BSNC: I was frowning and sulking so hard, I felt a headache coming. I refused to answer him, instead I crossed my arms and grumbled under my breath..

Dad: okay okay fine. I will tell my driver to teach or do you want one of brothers to help you

BSNC: I was so happy. Yes I won, but I didn’t want to sound too excited. I thought about it, my dad’s driver is one old guy that like preaching to everybody whenever he finds the opportunity, not that am the devil or anything, but I was not in that mood. I chose one of my brothers who treat me like a gem


My journey of driving began. We drove in this big school compound(me, my sis and two of my brodas). I wanted to use my dad’s car because it was automatic, but my bro says we have to learn with the manual first( it was so hard, why can’t I just use the automatic and make life easy for everybody). I always forget to press the clutch and change the gear. My sister has already picked up within 4 days. I was still moping around

Brown skin brother 1(the one teaching us to drive): Don’t worry you will get it. Take your time.

BSB 2: The girl go just spoil your car before this week end.

BSB 1: abeg leave her jo. She no be VSNC. She will get it

I was getting frustrated. I was trying my best and BSB 2 was making the situation worse, haba( who even send him to follow us sef hisss). Two days later I got it , by this time my sister could drive home. I move one step and she is two steps ahead of me. Anyhow my bro was like shey you know you are driving us home today. Who me, No, please I don’t think I’m ready. My brother; don’t worry you will be okay. I am here, trust me

We sha argued for 20 minutes. after which I summoned up courage and agreed to drive. I was so scared, my hands were sweaty, I could you hear the sound of my heart beat. I said a silent prayer and began my quest.

The distance from the school to my house was about 15 minutes. I felt so good, i couldn’t believe I was the one driving. Six blocks away from my house and the unexpected happened. The road to my house is very narrow, so if a big car is passing, the other car has to wait and vice versa. I know everybody in our area 13 blocks away, we are like one big enormous family. I was driving with one hand( I know lol am a big show off), everybody was waving at me and they were like can you see, bsnc is driving. I turned the music up, I was feeling like a roc star. Wyclef was blaring on the sterio “Enemies.. on the borderline, who be the next to fire.. 41 shot by diallo side. He said he rips sir, but he didn’t have no peace, but now he rest in peace, in the valley of the beast…. Diallo diallo”….( I love that song)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Itu-vykAZE

Where did I stop again? Ehen anyways I was six blocks away from my house and I saw the trailer( lorry..lol) coming and he was coming fast. I looked at my brother. He says bsnc pass now. I looked at him, looked at the trailer, looked at my sister, put the car on park.. opened the door and ran away( when I think of it now, I felt so stupid).i heard him calling, but I didn’t turn back. I just kept on running till I got home.

He got home 5 minutes later. I heard him calling me, heard him shouting my name. I was with my dad by this time ( I knew he couldn’t to anything to me). He came in, saw me and my dad. He gave me the dagger look; I must admit I have never seen my bro that angry before. I tried to apologize, but before I could say anything the insults just started pouring out from his mouth. I felt so bad, my dad was even angry with me. Do you want to kill your sister and your brother, how could you leave them like that. I wasn’t thinking straight that was the first thing that popped out of my head. My brother didn’t speak to me for a whole day( I cried all day, I felt so helpless), but he later spoke to me and told me he forgave me. After which he insisted I should never drive again

I knew before they told me, my driving days were over. I didn’t get behind the wheels again until two years later. We laugh about it now, but when I think about it now. All I can say is what was I thinking.. Did I mention am a good driver now, even though my mum can’t stand my driving. According to her I drive like a mad woman..lol , interpretation; I drive too fast. I drive too fast, but I have not gotten any ticket yet. (5 miles above the speed limit is too fast for her)

Hope a lovely day or night or better still have a lovely week

85 comments:

Tigeress said...

1st?

Tigeress said...

lmho!! that was funny!! Deserting ur siblings like dat.

*Abeni* said...

see this child oooo! I would have fought with you longer than one day sef, i wouldn't even share meat with you ahnahn! hehehehehe...don't all mother's think their children drive too fast?
funny story!

Buttercup said...

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i got here a lil too late :(

3rd aint bad sha..

thanks for the heads up..lol

L-VII said...

Aww, this story is so sweet, I must say, your pops was probably right that you were not ready to drive, lol. The story, it made me slightly home sick.

L.

NoLimit said...

lol at you parking and making the 100m dash! gal what were you thinking?...ROTFLMHO!!!
tew funny!

HRM said...

i am almost there...(first)
i ll keep working hard sha
(insert determined face here)

HRM said...

anyways...this story made my day!!
omG!!!
wen i got to the part where you ran out...i started rollin on my bed mayne!
lol

i could h-only h-imagine!

~Sirius~ said...

LOL!

I guess we both belong to the class of Lunatic female drivers...........

L.Hamilton ain't got S*@t on us!.....* I wish
he he he he

Sulihp said...

lol...lmsbo...i can't take it..hahhaha this post just made my day. i can just imagine how superstarish you were feeling..hahah

RaNDoMer said...

I'm 8th...going higher!
***singing - ladder ladder ladder ladder, follow the ladder to heaven***

RaNDoMer said...

word verfication wahala..i'm 9th
hiss

rethots said...

...and she does not like a challenge.

Buttercup said...

lmaooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

its somn i wud have done too..maybe not the running away part but i'd have just handed the wheel over to someone else..

lol u r funny sha!

Chari said...

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh Mon dieu!!!!

buahahahahahaha!!!

wow I used to think I was a coward

BSNC said...

@tigeress yes you are first again :). its wasn't my fault, i told him i was not ready

@Abeni lol yea my peeps can't say mad at me. lol@ share meat with me. it wasn't that bad now.. wetin sef. yea she is always like that with me

@Buttercup lol you know you are welcome.. its not my fault. my bro put me on the spot. thanks

@L-V11 thanks.. yea i guess he was right. eyya i didn't mean to make you homesick :(

@No limit i keep asking myself that. what was i really thinking..lol. thanks

@HRM lol you will be first soon, don't worry. am glad it made your dad.. thanks

thanks peeps

BSNC said...

@sirius lol i really don't drive that fast.. lol i know right, we wish..

@sulihp lol i was feeling on top of the world.. you should have seen me, but i became the laughing stock within seconds :(

@randomer lol you are still top ten :)

@rethots i just had to do it, i wasn't expecting that trailer.

@chari lol okay mister, am not a coward. I had no choice at that moment

thanks peeps

juiceegal said...

Lol..ur nt a crios child o...i want 2 kno wt ws on ur mind d whole time u were runnin..lol

jhazmyn said...

LOL, So wat wud u hav done if u were on a really busy road...ur just one wicked lil sis

blogoratti said...

Hilarious,hehe....but now look at you, all grown up and you even got nightrider*

Adaeze said...

hahaha i feel you girl i havent gotten my licence yet. you just reminded me damn lol

mizchif said...

LWKM!!! Chai! Which kain life! Dis babe, u are a nutcase. Like how in the world would your first instinct be to run out of the car.
Your siblings are very nice. I would have at least given you one better "abara" before forgiving you!

BSNC said...

@juicegal lol am not.. i was just like, lemme get home first. That trailer was huge, you would have seen it

@jhazmyn lol that didn't happen, thank God.. i'm not wicked really. i felt soo bad afterwards..

@blogoratti yea look at me now. i know right, nightrider has been good to me recently, no car drama :)

@adaeze lol you better go get that licence. good luck with that

@mizchiff hahaha am not a nutcase oo. i dunno the trailer huge and it was moving so fast. what would you have done??

lol yes they are. i was miserable the whole day. they had to put me out of my misery now..

thanks peeps

yankeenaijababe said...

Missed your blog...am back. How have you been?Thanks for the birthday wishes. U have a good one

Sting said...

That was one funny sorry. I can just imagine u bailing from the car.

Repressed One said...

LMAOO...u actually ran away? The visual is hilarious. I'm with Mizchif oh...U for chop serious abara. tew funny.

LovePaprika said...

just blowing a kiss.. im so exhausted :( read this later.. xx

BSNC said...

@YNB welcome back.i have been okay, thanks for asking. you are welcome. you too...

@sting thanks lol yea i know.i'm glad you are better now. thanks :)

@Repressed One lol yes i did. ahh ahh thats not fair now..lol. you guyz didn't see the trailer. thanks :)

@LovePaprika thats so sweet. thanks babe, please try and relax. take care :)

thanks peeps

Just...Toluwa said...

u know u got me rolling ryt! lol!

u ran? LMAO!

lol..i cant stop laffing!

naijagirl said...

hahahaha....i so knew you were not getting another teaching offer. I am glad you eventually learned.
My dad gave my brother and I the option of going to a driving school vs going to holiday lesson or computer lesson....i jumped at driving school. Didnt learn much from the school, i just thot it was cool learning how to drive at my age

Original Mgbeke said...

LOL, I gbadun you o! You were even learning with a shift stick? Learning to drive shift is one of my to-do's.
Man, learning to drive was scary sha but looking back, it's like what was the big deal?

Bibi said...

so nor be today you start to fear anyhow? lol. at least you can manage to drive today. hehehe

Good Naija Girl said...

The way you abandoned your siblings just cracked me up! lol you know how to tell a story...keep me hooked right until the end!

Woomie O! said...

Yelloooowwwwwwwwwwww!!!
Just bumped into your blog.
Peachy.
I have already learned something : Be Determined!!!!
lol.

justdoyin said...

interesting story...I'm sure u crack up whenever u remember it...funny, but not so funny, how u left ur siblings in d middle of the road 2 face an oncoming trailer (did that make u feel guilty?)lol...

scribble,me.free said...

lmao!!! I would have spent that one day laughing at you...you RAN away! that's jokes!

Gourmet Truffle said...

Ahn ahn! You RAN out of the car?!!! Mwahahahahahahah! omg! I can relate tho...I only learnt how to drive two years ago and all those okadas overtaking you can be very intimidating and can make you freeze at the wheel....but mayne...u actually ran out??lol that's insane!

BSNC said...

@just toluwa lol what wasn't really thinking. yea i ran....

@naijagirl yea after two years when my sis was already driving :( . it was soo cool, but they took it away from me.

@Original mgbeke thank you jo. abeg tell them, it wasn't easy at all. i know it seems so easy now. From your last post, hope you are giving yourself a break oo :)

@bibi lol no e don tay.. see your head like manage to drive, i'm a good driver

@GNG lol thanks, but i didn't really mean to abandon them. it just happened..

@woomie O lol thanks. yes was so determined, but i messed up.. big time. thanks for stopping by. i will scoot over your blog soon

@just doyin i crack up, but then i wonder what was i really thinking. trust me i felt soo guilty. All i can say right now is thank God nothing happened to them..

@scibble i was going to fine you for not coming to my blog( 2 blue cow and 1 pink cock)..

lol yes my brother did not find it funny at that point in the time, but we laugh about it now. I wish you had seen the trailer, that thing was huge..

@Gourmet Truffle yes i did..lol funny enough i had no problem with okadas. lol i really don't know why i ran out.

thanks peeps ( i know this post was kind of long.. thanks for reading)

Adeola said...

Lol, Lol! i can understand your plight at the time jare. For God sake you werebarely 16! real interesting read,trying to imagine you doing the run tho i don;t know you but...very funny

Shubby Doo said...

that was sooo funny...i cannot believe u jumped out and ran! hahahahahahahaha!!!

Fashinga said...

lmao!!!!!!!!! babes i too love you!!! you're just too much..

when you said that you ran and left them, i was laughing like crazy...lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Later Luvs!!
F.

bob-ij said...

lol..that clutch thing was a very hard P for me! I tried hard to no avail!...hehehehe

x!

*Diane* said...

omg! lmao!! hilarious! i can understand why you ran. when i first started driving, i used to be scared that all the big trucks would fall over on top of my car..lol.

Omo Oba said...

wait! I am #44? chei! na wa for u o! u just left your sibs hanging like that! That must have been a moment to be remembered! well well at least u didnt hit another car or sth, and u are driving today. my mother thinks i drive too fast too but she taught me how to drive fast o.

Omo Oba said...

lol! @ randomer's comment. Man, that song "follow the ladder to heaven" is on youtube and it is deadarse funny. ok night BSNC, i enjoy your stories, u are one heck of a hilarious storyteller!

BSNC said...

@adeola thanks you jo... someone who understand my plight. lol thanks :)

@shubby Doo lol i did o, but i was smart enough to put the car on park..

@fashinga awww thanks F. you know i heart you too.. lol i did o, you know they still laugh at me till tomorrow..

@bob-ij ehen so you know what i'm talking about. its not easy o..lol

@Diane i can't understand too.. lol i was scared of everything too, but now i can cruise..

thanks peeps

BSNC said...

@omo oba lol yes, but i left them in good hands(my big bro). yes o and i must say am a very good driver although my mum will not agree with me. lol mums are their wahala, but we still love them

awww thanks alot

Naughty Eyes said...

Were you learning to drive or to run? LMYOROTFLMYOPIMPKTFWTFME

Naughty Eyes said...

And thanks for dropping by mine and adding me to your blogroll

Afrobabe said...

lmao...I could just picture you taking off....

Penelope said...

looool...but y did u run away now? Shey u wanted to learn how to drive by force by fire! lol
I agree with afrobabe, i have the funniest Imagery of ur takeoff in my head right now.

Nice Anon said...

lol funny story.

Dante said...

Finally..the eagle lands!

Haaa..You and driving. lol. My mum was and is still that way..She just couldn't cut it.
But BSNC..you be 'genge' nah nah..You and nightrider dey get communion everyday...

SouLBoutiQue said...

Oh my goodness what were you thinking!? But that was soo funny. Funny enough people say i drive like a mad woman too, beg jo they should leave us. and omo we are allowed 5 miles over the speed limit....even though i surpass that many times!

Kenn-Knotty said...

lol, really hilarious. So your mum says you drive like a mad woman? Ehen na, that must be true as you no finish your driving lesson.

Brown Sugar said...

wow...LOL. i can just imagine you taking one look at thelorry, and running out of the car...
you give me inspiration tho. I;m still learning to drive. I have my permit already, but the only available car is the family van, which is too wide...lol

BSNC said...

@naughty eye lol i was learning to drive before oo. you are more than welcome

ehen what does this mean
LMYOROTFLMYOPIMPKTFWTFM

was i even close

@afrobabe lol i was scared jo, it wasn't my fault na

@penelope you would have seen the tralier. lol yes i took off oo

@Nice Anon thanks, when are you going public now eh

@Dante finally you try ... lol yes o. ehen nightrider sends his greeting oo

@SoulBoutique i keep asking myself that same question. i tire o, they should free us jo. its allowed jare. i was driving 70 on a 55mph today. Nightrider( my car) like driving fast.

@Kenn-knotty lol yes she does. i finished o, two years after this incidence..

@Brownsugar lol my sister you would have been there. Car na car. just make do with what you have now

thanks peeps

Dee Brighton said...

LMAO! this is jokes

Mz. Eniola said...

u really did make my day!looool!x

Tee said...

My mum thought i was going crazy when i just started laughing to myself while reading this post. It was just too too funny! the part where you ran out of the car. lol

African Weight Loss Diva said...

Wow. that was so funny! i wonder how they felt. Nice post

Sweetnothin' said...

hahahhahhaha. OMG i cant stop lauughing. I'll come back and write something better when i stop laughing.

BSNC said...

@Dee Brighton lol yea, but it was not so funny that day

@Mz Eniola awww i'm glad... thanks

@Tee lol tell your mum you are okay oo. lol yea i know, but i felt bad that day sha..

@African Weight Loss Diva they were so angry with me, but they can't stay mad at me :). thanks

@sweetnothin lol okay no problem, take your time

My World said...

I made a comment on this post,didnt I???
Alright,really funny indeed but I was lucky not being nervous when I got to start driving at about the same age actually.

Frankie Rose said...

OMG! seriously thought, you got out of the car and ran! lol.....too funny.

BSNC said...

@My world lol yes you did... really you were not nervous hmm, you try oo

@frankie Rose lol yes i know

Cappuccine Baby said...

LOOOOOOOOOL!

miss.fab said...

lol this was too funny!!!

Cidersweet said...

Congrats on finally learning to drive. At 18! This officially makes me an agbaya (I dunno how to drive yet, in my (cough cough) old age. I rise to the challenge, BrownSkin!
Very nice post.

Olufunke said...

Very interesting..LOL
I am trying to imagine you running away from the car. What did your dad say when he learn t you ran out of a car? :-)
At least you are now a very good driver.........

BSNC said...

@CB yea laff me well well oo.

@mis Fab thanks alot and thanks for stopping by

@cidersweet thanks o..lol ahh ahh you are not an agbaya now, my aunt who is 38 cannot still drive. what with you call her..

thanks C

@olufunke thanks alot.. my dad was angry at first, but he couldnt stay mad at me now( as per daddy's pet)..

yes i am, but my mum will never agree. thanks for stopping by

thanks people

Funms-the rebirth said...

lmao......... u did what???????? oh gurl, ur something else.....

theafricanwomen said...

LOL!

and thanks for being one of the first at our blog - hope to see your opinions soon?

3 Bay B Chicks said...

In my book, if you have never been caught, then you are definitely not driving too fast! Great story. Had me laughing the whole way through.

-Francesca

BSNC said...

@ funms lol i ran away... i don't know what got into me

@theafricanwoman you are welcome. its a nice blog. yea sure thing

@Francesca i have never ever be caught and i really hope it stays that way. thanks F

thanks peeps

YNG said...

BSNC thanks for stopping by my blog:)...Btw this post was so funny...who does that?....parking the car and running.............LOOOOOL.

bumight said...

no you didnt! who does that? as in u ran home?

LOL!

ManCee said...

Good one girl.
Got me laffing from line one
'In the parlour', I thot 'chei, this girl na naija chic tru tru'

Per driving like a mad woman..Emm, that can better be put as 'driving like a naija driver'
lol
Nice one.I'm stiil chuckling

BSNC said...

@YNG you are welcome.. lol i do that... thanks for stopping by

@bumight lol yes i did, but i wasn't thinking. yes i ran home to my pops...

@ManCee lol yes o..abi, tell that to my mumsie. thanks and thanks for stopping by

thanks alot peeps

aloted said...

lmao..this was too funny....kai...

lol

Naughty Eyes said...

@ BSNC: Yeah you were much too close... Check my comments on the post again to see the meaning>

Sexkitten said...

Lol. This is too funny. They were right...You weren't ready to drive.

Tairebabs said...

diallo diallo....I loved that song too. Humm, this is why I like blogville, you end up finding out that so many people have gone through or are going through similar situations like you. My driving story right from 9jar has been one thing after the other as well..I had three driving lessons before my mum's driver finally thought me how to drive,...ooooh i learnt how to drive a manual car, infact i loved it but now I am not sure I can drive automatic. Not passed my test in yankee yet. By God's grace soon.

BSNC said...

@aloted lol thanks babe

@naughty eye yea i was close, i checked it out

@sex kitten lol now know that, but i am a good driver now

@tairebabs yes that song is a classic. me too, i don't know if i can drive a manual now. Amen you will pass your test :)

thanks peeps

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